A few days into the traverse, we had begun to exchange notes on what meal we would order when we got back to civilization. My fantasy meal was a BLT. Once vehicles had been retrieved and the group was back together, the first order of business was to get to the nearest cafe. I ordered two BLT meals and a dessert.

Immediately after the trip, Pete was officially dumped and Barb was my girlfriend—for about 6 months.